I want you to know, I love my brother…
My brother and I go out for breakfast every Saturday. The waitresses all think it’s “cute,” because we’re brothers and we still want to hang out with each other. He’s six years older than me, and will be turning 70 this year. 70? Like, how did that happen so quickly? And he’s not even the oldest. That brother’s turning 75 in…oh shit, in 4 days! He doesn’t live nearby. He’s not even in the same province. I guess that means a phonemail, which is great by me, because they usually last about an hour.
So back to my other brother. He has a twisted sense of humour, has no concept of what political correctness is, tends to say things like: “The last time I got in contact with my inner self, my finger went through the toilet paper.” Of course, it’s usually followed by “Ewwws,” from my wife and any other female in the room, and raucous laughter from every guy wishing they’d come up with that line. I know it’s not his, but I can’t for the life of me figure o…
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