Processing this event will take time, and even then there will be a part missing from your life. The fact you were there, together… was more than a lot of people are able to do - and by no means an I belittling those who for whatever reason cannot sit and wait for someone to cross the veil - it is hard, it is a front row seat to mortality, it can devastate some.
The best we can do is be there for one another in the tough times. Put aside our anger at the unfairness, cope as we are able, but most importantly - love each other, especially your life mate. In that love you will find solace, hope and the rain we are here. Lose yourself in love when you can, it will give you strength to stand to all the things that come after the moment a family member passes - no matter if it’s a blood relative or a close friend you have chosen to be part of your extended family.
Know you have so many people here who care, and so many more beyond this data built walls, aka out in the real world. Don’t be afraid to give voice to your needs, and never apologize for what grief needs in terms of time off from regular day to day events.
Cherish each other. Go to her, take her hands, look into her eyes and tell her how much you love her, that you are here for her and how lucky you are to find solace in her love for you in this time of soul wrenching hardship. Sometimes you need to remind each other of your commitments. Be well.
Ben, I am sending you and your family love and prayers as you do this hard thing. Take the time you need, or don't. Eat the food, or don't. Listen to the music, or don't. There is no right way. Just know that we are all holding you in our heart as yours is broken.
Thank you Donna. It's never easy. (But, eating the food is too easy.) The music is the soundtrack of my life. And no, there is right or wrong way is there...there's just getting through it.
It’s always hard, but harder still because he’s the first. She’s a little broken at the moment, but his siblings are there for her as much as she’s there for them. Time will be the healing agent for both of us…and love.
Sending my deepest condolences to you all Ben. I am so sad to hear this. Please stay close to each other as you have strength together. As someone else we know once said,
Oh Patti, it came as such a shock to both of us. I came into the family when he was three. He's the reason the other nieces and nephews call her Honey -- it was pretty well one of his first words. She's broken a little at the moment, and being with the family so she can hold our niece and nephew, as well as our sister-in-law; so she can cook and clean for them and just hold them -- because that's the way her mother raised her -- so she can be the Auntie to them because they are her brother's children...we'll get back together with you guys in a while, I promise. She just needs a little time to accept the finality of it all. She loved him more than anyone else in the world. All we do at the moment is cry in each others' arms, and hold one another -- that and listen to Bob Marley at "11". The family needs her, because she is their Honey as well, and she doesn't want to let them down. You know how big her heart is; you know her family means more to her than her own life.
So sorry for your loss, Ben. No matter how often we go through something like this, it doesn't get any easier. Conserve your energy for healing yourself and your family.
Words are unable to express how much loss one feels at a time like this. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Remember the good times and keep them warm in your heart.
Processing this event will take time, and even then there will be a part missing from your life. The fact you were there, together… was more than a lot of people are able to do - and by no means an I belittling those who for whatever reason cannot sit and wait for someone to cross the veil - it is hard, it is a front row seat to mortality, it can devastate some.
The best we can do is be there for one another in the tough times. Put aside our anger at the unfairness, cope as we are able, but most importantly - love each other, especially your life mate. In that love you will find solace, hope and the rain we are here. Lose yourself in love when you can, it will give you strength to stand to all the things that come after the moment a family member passes - no matter if it’s a blood relative or a close friend you have chosen to be part of your extended family.
Know you have so many people here who care, and so many more beyond this data built walls, aka out in the real world. Don’t be afraid to give voice to your needs, and never apologize for what grief needs in terms of time off from regular day to day events.
Cherish each other. Go to her, take her hands, look into her eyes and tell her how much you love her, that you are here for her and how lucky you are to find solace in her love for you in this time of soul wrenching hardship. Sometimes you need to remind each other of your commitments. Be well.
Thank you for those beautiful words. I have tears just reading them. I thank for them from the bottom of my heart.
My condolences to you and your family, Ben. Be well.
Heart goes out to you!
Ben, I am sending you and your family love and prayers as you do this hard thing. Take the time you need, or don't. Eat the food, or don't. Listen to the music, or don't. There is no right way. Just know that we are all holding you in our heart as yours is broken.
Thank you Donna. It's never easy. (But, eating the food is too easy.) The music is the soundtrack of my life. And no, there is right or wrong way is there...there's just getting through it.
So sorry to hear this Ben and Renu! My heart goes out to you! ❤️❤️
It’s always hard, but harder still because he’s the first. She’s a little broken at the moment, but his siblings are there for her as much as she’s there for them. Time will be the healing agent for both of us…and love.
I’m so sorry for your loss, Ben. This was a very touching homage to your nephew. ❤️
Condolences to you and your family. May the angels wrap their loving arms around you through these heartbreaking times.
Sending my deepest condolences to you all Ben. I am so sad to hear this. Please stay close to each other as you have strength together. As someone else we know once said,
"Remember the good times."
Sending you guys my thoughts, prayers and love.
We aren’t going anywhere. We’re with you in this although we’re scattered far and wide. Take all the time you need.
My heart aches for you both and the rest of the family 💔hugs
Oh Patti, it came as such a shock to both of us. I came into the family when he was three. He's the reason the other nieces and nephews call her Honey -- it was pretty well one of his first words. She's broken a little at the moment, and being with the family so she can hold our niece and nephew, as well as our sister-in-law; so she can cook and clean for them and just hold them -- because that's the way her mother raised her -- so she can be the Auntie to them because they are her brother's children...we'll get back together with you guys in a while, I promise. She just needs a little time to accept the finality of it all. She loved him more than anyone else in the world. All we do at the moment is cry in each others' arms, and hold one another -- that and listen to Bob Marley at "11". The family needs her, because she is their Honey as well, and she doesn't want to let them down. You know how big her heart is; you know her family means more to her than her own life.
Keep holding your special lady we will be together when the time is right until then hold each other tight.
So sorry for your loss, Ben. No matter how often we go through something like this, it doesn't get any easier. Conserve your energy for healing yourself and your family.
Take your time to grieve. I am so sorry for your loss.
Words are unable to express how much loss one feels at a time like this. My deepest condolences to you and your family. Remember the good times and keep them warm in your heart.
So sorry for your loss. My best to you and your family.
There are no words for comfort in times like this
Genuinely sorrowful for your loss.